December 18, 2015

This week: UFC rematches, Reality Talk, Parenting Storytime, and more..

"It wasn't a real fight" - Former featherweight champ Jose Aldo uttered that sour grapes sentiment (via translator) moments after he was on the receiving end of a record-setting KO (fastest in a title fight) at the hands of newly crowned champ Conor McGregor.  Three championship belts have changed hands in the past month (Ronda Rousey, Chris Weidman, and Jose Aldo) and each former champ faces the inevitable question that surfaces after a title fight loss "Do they deserve a rematch?". 

Rematches are tricky business.  UFC President Dana White regularly asserts the position of "we'll give the fans what they want to see".  But rematches tend to be a little more complex than just putting your finger to the wind of Twitter to see "what the fans want".  There are some basic questions White and matchmaker Joe Silva will ask in the coming weeks to determine whether a rematch is justified.  Let's use our recently dethroned champs as the litmus test for the Rematch Conundrum

• "Was it a close fight?" - Weidman got thoroughly dominated by Luke Rockhold and looked completely mangled after the fight.  Rousey certainly lost the first round to Holly Holm and was KO'd in the second.  Aldo lasted two punches and 13 seconds against McGregor.  Weidman: NO  Rousey: NO  Aldo: NO
• "Is there a clear #1 contender waiting their turn?" - Weidman's middleweight division is experiencing a downturn in talent and the undercard of Saturday's PPV featured a very uninspired bout between the #3 and #4 contenders Yoel Romero and Jacare Souza.  And there are no matchups of worthy contenders on the horizon.  The dearth of talent gives Weidman the edge.  Rousey spent the last 3 years laying siege to the Women's Bantamweight division and should have a leg up on the competition for #1 contender.  But new champ Holly Holm already expressed interest in fighting Miesha Tate instead of a Rousey rematch. However, releasing Rousey back into the division to fight her way back would be like letting a velociraptor loose on an emu farm.  It wouldn't be pretty or fair to anyone.  Aldo entered Saturday on an 18-fight winning streak, and similar to Rousey, had been manhandling the entire division since entering the UFC in 2011 with his WEC Featherweight Belt.  But #1 contender and former Lightweight champ Frankie Edgar just completed his sojourn through the division proving his worthiness as the next man in line for a shot at the title.  Weidman: NO  Rousey: NO  Aldo: YES
• "Will it bring a big audience?" - i.e., would the fans pay to see it?  I don't presume to have a finger on the pulse of MMA fans, so I'll stick to my own pulse.  Weidman got overpowered, outwrestled, and beat up but I think the lack of middleweight talent coupled with his unblemished record entering the fight and the presumption that maybe he just had an off night warrants a rematch.  Rousey looked sluggish, lethargic, slow, and other synonyms that mean out-of-shape.  And Holm played her like a fiddle strategically.  I doubt Ronda makes the same mistakes twice and it would be semi-dangerous to expose the rest of the division to her Road to Redemption.  Multiple fighters would get their arms broken.  Put Rousey and Holm in the cage again and let's see what happens.  Aldo's KO loss was such an outlier that I don't envy the UFC brass deliberating the rematch decision.  Its a 50-50 argument.  It wasn't a normal fight, but it was definitely a real fight, Aldo's sour grapes notwithstanding.  McGregor won fair and square and I think Aldo should start a few rungs down the ladder and climb his way back up.  A McGregor vs Edgar matchup would be a pretty easy sell and would certainly pull some strong numbers.  Weidman: YES  Rousey: YES  Aldo: NO

Since the start of 2010, belts have changed hands via force (i.e. a fight) 13 times, and in only three cases was a rematch granted (B.J. Penn, Frankie Edgar, Anderson Silva) and all three lost again in the rematch.  Those are long odds for each of the recently ousted champs, but each of them have unique, compelling cases for a rematch....except for Aldo, I think Aldo's screwed.

Reality Talk: TV Edition - Ever since MTV debuted The Real World in 1992 reality TV has been evolving to fill millions of hours of airtime.  The format of filming 20-somethings in a new city was just the beginning.  In the last 20+ years TV producers have established a spectrum of reality-based TV sub-genres to satiate the appetite of all sorts of fans.  Now, when I say I watch "reality TV" I'm not embarrassed since its more than just The Kardashians and Bad Girls Club.  Here are some of my faves (and maybe your faves, too)

• Survivor and The Amazing Race (both return in Feb, CBS) - Reality competition is a bonafide Emmy category and these two shows are really fun to watch because they constantly have my wife and I asking "would you do that?" and sparking spirited discussion about who would bungee jump off that rickety bridge in Thailand or how would you fare in this immunity challenge.  Jeff Probst and Phil Keoghan are fun hosts and these are just fun shows.  See also: SYTYCD, The Voice, Dancing With the Stars
• Top Chef (Thursday 10pm, Bravo) and Holiday Baking Championship (Sunday 9pm, Food Network) - Cooking competition shows are very popular and these two caught my eye in the last few years.  I've enjoyed seeing how much variety there is in the culinary world.  I eat pork chops and brownies, but these people cook salmon carpaccio and triple pastry cream croquembouche.  Its fascinating to watch and the judges are entertaining with their critiques.  I actually like that they take it so seriously; it SHOULD be that way.  See also: Chopped, The Great Food Truck Race, Iron Chef America
• The Profit (Tuesday 10pm, CNBC) and Shark Tank (Friday 10pm, ABC) - Reality investment shows are popping up everywhere with the success of Shark Tank.  The Profit is, by far, my favorite.  After three seasons of that show I'm only 4 credits short of my MBA.  I could easily run a Fortune 500 company.....into the ground.  Marcus Lemonis is likable, genuine, fair, savvy, smart, and innovative.  He makes me want to have a failing business just so he can come save it.  Shark Tank has slowly evolved from fringe Friday night filler TV to credible, legitimate American institution.  Its not a punchline anymore rather an exercise in the spirit of American entrepreneurship and ingenuity finding a way to succeed.  Aside: If you watch the episode where Nick Woodman guest-Sharks, keep count of every time he says "You know, when I started GoPro...".  That phrase floated around our house quite a bit after that episode anytime we wanted to humblebrag: [got the boy to sleep on the first try] "You know, when I started GoPro..".  See also: Restaurant Startup, Blue Collar Millionaire, All-American Makers
• Nightwatch (Thursday, A&E 10pm) - Reality crime dramas have been around longer than The Real World and this Dick Wolf-produced docudrama follows the EMT, Fire & Rescue and Police Officers of New Orleans as they work the night shift in a city renowned for lively, raucous crowds.  It pushes the envelope of that age-old disclaimer "Viewer Discretion is Advised", so watch at your own risk.  The characters are very likable and engaging and its inspiring to see such unsung heroes in action.  See also: COPS, Jail, The First 48
• House Hunters (every other hour on HGTV) - Truthfully I don't watch House Hunters much anymore, but it gave rise to dozens of imitators like Buying Alaska, Buying the Rockies, Lakefront Bargain Hunt which I watch semi-regularly.  Shows like these allow you to experience the excitement of house shopping without the added pressure of signing paperwork at the end of the episode.  

Other shows worth a look: Treehouse Masters, Tanked, Redwood Kings, Fixer Upper, Property Brothers, Income Property, Pawn Stars

FAKE!!! Watch with a scrutinizing eye: Mystery Diners, Bar Rescue, South Beach Tow, Operation Repo, Hardcore Pawn

Things we learned this week:

• Russell Westbrook hit this insane buzzer beater
• My Mom shared this Uptown Funk fused with Ginger Rogers-era dance numbers.  It was awesome
• This Dad watching Star Wars with his son for the first time was really sweet
• #adeletickets had me crying laughing with all of the shared experiences of coping with loss and disappointment.  

Parenting Storytime - Henry had the sniffles this week bad enough to warrant staying home from school.  He spent his week slaloming from energized and active to lethargic and cranky.  One of his crankier periods was spent sitting on the couch slowly eating his new favorite snack, Ritz Crackers with Nutella.  I spread a thin layer of that hazelnut chocolaty goodness between two Honey Wheat Ritz and he takes approximately 13 bites to eat it.  We were sitting side-by-side on our loveseat and he's working on bite #7 and I hear a sneeze.  All of bite #7's and most of bite #6's contents now look like Martian kitty litter sprayed all over his left arm.  Henry noticed the tablespoon of green blobulous snot hanging precariously from his nose one second before I did and wiped his left arm across his face making a guacomole kitty litter chutney that had me scrambling to find the nearest towel to spare my leather couch from a disgustingly sticky future.  Couch: Saved.  Towel: Steam-cleaned

Took a week off to enjoy the Thanksgiving holiday and now we're back on track

College Football Playoff (CFP) Chaos, it's all the rage:  Several weeks ago I pitched the idea of UNC crashing the CFP Final Four and then all of America read the same tea leaves and the Tar Heels have occupied much of the discussion ever since.  My royalty check for such a prescient idea must be lost in the mail.  Oh well.  After making such a bold prediction that Larry Fedora would challenge the committee's Mission Statement, I'm prepared to take a wild left turn off that same idea and predict yet another layer of chaos.  Let's set the stage for Saturday:  Oklahoma is IN, Alabama is IN after a tougher-than-expected win over UF, the B1G champ is IN, and Stanford loses to USC.  With that setup, Clemson and UNC wage a war for the ages.  Two high-scoring offenses with overlooked defenses engage in a defensive struggle that ultimately results in a grind-it-out, last second GW field goal for UNC 23-21.  Under those very specific circumstances, I predict a scenario where Clemson claims the #4 spot in the Playoff.  This obviously thumbs its nose at the AP Poll traditionalists who are still brainwashed to believe that losses immediately knock you out of contention and open the door for another team with its own older loss to whiz past them in the rankings.  But if the committee is entrusted to select the "best four teams" and Clemson has unquestionably held the #1 spot for most of the season and loses a nailbiter on the final play to a team that everyone, including the committee, has kicked in the shins for 3 weeks because of a weak, FCS-laden schedule then why not Clemson?  Admittedly, this scenario looks waaaay different if Clemson gets their teeth kicked in for four quarters, but a hard fought loss in a conference championship game should keep the Tigers in the running for the National Title.  

Proud (??) NFL Sunday Ticket Subscriber:  Paul Tagliabue got his wish.  Parity runs amok in the NFL and I'm not convinced its such a good thing.  I suppose the idea of parity is meant to keep every team in contention for a longer period of the season and inspire playoff hopes among more fan bases across the league, but its actually created one giant morass of Meh.  Each week I set up three TVs in my bonus room and fire up my Sunday Ticket package eagerly seeking the marquee matchups that will keep me sitting on the edge of my seat from 1pm to 7pm.  Instead I do a once-over on the schedule and realize most of these games will be complete snoozefests.  I've come to refer to the 2nd quarter as my naptime for the day.  Entering Sunday, 13 teams (40% of the league) are within 1 game of .500.  Another six teams are 4-7 with the last sliver of playoff aspirations hanging in the wind this weekend.  As a fan, its impossible to get excited about most of these teams (I'm ignoring the fantasy component of watching football; call me corny, but I watch football for the love of the game).  Its not like they are all equally matched super-squads with multiple HOFs among them slugging it out every Sunday for a small chance of staying alive in the playoff hunt.  Nope, these are ugly teams playing mostly ugly football.  Granted, I'm a Falcons fan, so I see alot of ugly football which might cloud my vision, but I do have 2 other televisions with other games on and commonly those games lack just as much sizzle as the Dirty Birds.  I don't have the space to solve this problem, but suffice it to say that it IS a problem that originated from a solution to a different problem 25 years ago.  

Parenting Story of the Week: My wife has a pretty good habit of regularly tidying up our kids' clothes drawers and reposing old clothes to the Rubbermaids in our garage.  Its getting cold here in NC and my 2.5 year old son had a dearth of adequate pants.  As I rummaged through his pants drawer I saw some jeans he hadn't worn in awhile and thought "eh, these'll work".  As soon as I put them on he quickly rubbed his belly right at the waistband and I didn't think anything of it, then as he ran down the hallway I thought "man, he's getting tall, those pants are highwaters on him".  A little while later my wife came home and pointed out to me that I put our 33 month old son in 18 month old jeans.  I'm an idiot.  

Random Thoughts: 

• Annie Lennox begat Pink. Cyndi Lauper begat Lady Gaga. Barbara Streisand begat Adele. 
• Sometimes I toast my PB&J bread to trick my stomach into thinking I'm eating a hot meal.

Things we learned this week:

• Jahlil Okafor hates losing almost as much as he hates being heckled about losing
• Kerwin Roach got mad hops
• These two Adele-related videos from SNL and the BBC caught my eye.
• I played this for my in-laws last week and they laughed heartily at Moms learning iTunes.

Housekeeping: Please note the polls on the right margin.  They'll stay active for the week and polling will close every Friday night.  If you have a poll question submission just email me and we'll see, no promises.  I'll also regularly post fun lists for you to WOW your friends at the water cooler. I've received suggestions for future topics, but some of them are outside of my wheelhouse.  So, I encourage you to submit a paragraph on a topic from the world of sports or entertainment and I'll see if you can co-opt a section of my blog :)  I'm hoping to do a section on Survivor and/or The Amazing Race in the coming weeks.  Top Chef returned this week, too, so maybe that'll make the cut.  Finally, if you're new to The Chatter check out the archives.  I went live with this iteration of the blog this week, but beta testing included some early blog posts.  Check 'em out.